why Robin Williams meant so much to me.

I've never been one to be star struck, to freak out at fame. I've met hundreds of famous people. I gushed a little bit over Stevie wonder and Sir Michael Caine, but never lost my cool. I nearly did when I met Robin Williams. He had been a hero of mine, a foul mouthed, funny as hell ADD kid, that made everyone laugh. Working where I did, I never knew who was to be our next visitor. I'd get a call for tea or cakes, or some such food and I'd bring it where I was told, give a wee presentation and then be off to cook something else. I had a conversation about Guinness with Steven Spielberg but it was nothing like just sitting with Robin. He was quiet, reserved, and seemed almost uncomfortable. He was very kind, complimentary, and even asked about bits of my training and life. I expressed my gratitude and explained that he was the most important person of my youth. I really had two heroes growing up. I was the outcast in all things. I wasn't able to do much physically due to my injuries. I was an awkward boy with little social skills. I had a wicked case of jumpies as one of my teachers called it. I would jump from subject to subject like mad. I was later placed in what they called "retard" class. Yes they were still not so politically correct in the 80's and I was placed in Special ed, or Retard class. I'll get to that later though.. My other hero is of course my Grand father. I'm certain that he would, by his lonesome, figure out how to defeat all of the zombies, build a deck, rewire a car made out of wood, and create electricity from chewing gum. My thoughts are disjointed. I will save my grand da for another time. He's still way cooler than anyone i've ever met though. Childhood was rough. I'm not going to whine about it, I just don't want to forget it. I feel like a load of people blame things on a rough childhood. "oooooh My da didn't love me , he didn't express his feelings" this is utter crap. Don't blame crap on your upbringing, understand it and own it. Find an outlet for c sakes. I was a broken legged, blindish lad, who had wicked a d d, I came from a very abusive poor poooor family, and look at me now. I'm older and have never been to jail. Its the little things. I'm kidding. I read a load, sat upstairs in my grandparents house, read dictionarys, german bibles, physics books, learned crap from the early 1900's. My outlet was information, activity. Where am I going with this IDK. My outlet became humour. I would be beaten and I'd laugh, it would make the beatings worse, but I'd laugh harder, cry, and laugh some more. I don't know if this is a trait I collected from my grandmum. She would laugh at funerals, we laughed together at her own sisters funeral a couple times. Levity got me through life. Things weren't good growing up, things were very bad actually. I could handle the abuse, the no food often, the being left in random casino arcades or shipped off to people I didn't really know. I couldn't handle how people saw me though. I felt frail, I was always told how frail, how weak, how stupid, how this and that I was. I met mork very early on in my youth. He seemed just as awkward as I. I could relate. I often felt as thought i was on the outside ofhumanity looking in. I wanted to report to someone. "today I felt this, I can see others feeling something similar but in a completely different way." Mork out/ I've now had three ciders, and can fully engage add mode. lets do odd things top ten things I learned from RW 10. Hide in Plain sight sometimes disclosing so much people thing you're an open book, is a means to actually keeping all of your secrets. 9. Take the parts If you're hard up for work, take the parts you're not cast for. Work hard, learn something new, break out of your type casting. 8. Don't be afraid to be animated. Real life cartoons exist. Be animated, be Italian, learn to express everything to give someone else pleasure. I've often had the best days because I've made a kid laugh. 'I'm a real live boyyyy" 7. Let people know you can be serious. We can be a genie, or we can be a doctor, where is my "finding Forrester and good will hunting" Crossover. know that your life can bleed over to work, cover when you can, use its energy to make work brilliant. 6. Know your faults, Remember one of his first bits on tele? He used to do heavy drugs and ETOH, he later became a vegan and supporter of people's health. Sometimes we can stick with something. I love cooking for people, I love entertaining, I love ETOH, i've never done any drug of any kind. My health issues should have me taking all sorts of pain aids but I can't stand for taking that much . I have a couple ciders and forget the pain for a bit. Wake up try to resist and feel the pain all over again. I really wish people knew how much pain I was in every day. My legs hurt me so much that I often don't get out of the car, i just sit in the lot until i have the energy to get out. I am sure my sis would tease me about this. Sorry foot was right the other night. I just couldn't move 5. Support what you believe in. he was a firm supporter of the military, not the missions but the people who served. I served, love my country and my fellow sailors and soldiers. I cannot say whether I agree or disagree with operations, but i would put my life above all of my fellow service members. 4/ Don't be afraid to be hairy I really don't have to give description to this one. I'm short, hairy, and can be funny on occasion. RW could have been my da. 3/ Compliment and bee yourself.(when you can) Hiding in plain sight is difficult, jump around, be yourself, enjoy randomness eat dessert first and be honest with your chef 2. I learned that you should have asked for help, should have should have should have. should have not said should have. We feel so alone, surrounded by people, surrounded by the people that love us, endear us, and prais us. We do not, however, feel loved or appreciated. I feel this way all the time. I'm told not to be so dramatic, not to dwell, or get over it. I try, i've been through hell, to war, to the town of hate and it's so hard to do as others say. I'm okay now but I know I'll end up like you if I don't ask for help. 1. Feel free to jump around, harnass your funny and if they don't think you are go to another subject. I laugh at myself, others, daily random whatevers, I can be the genie or donkey or whatever the hell I want. I need to laugh, learn, love and be whatever to make others happy. I feel like my ten things are bloody lame. I met you a couple times, you loved my food and teas, i loved how you protected my sanity. I'm sorry that there was nothing we could have done for you. I could go on but I don't know what else to write right now... I'm very sad and I don't know what to do about it. I very much doubt others would even understand why i feel the way I do. I've written this post over the few hours since I've learned of his death. i'll get a couple views, my friends will glance over it. Robbin Williams, #Robbinwilliams, will always be an inspiration, a motivation to and for me. I loved that he was such a proponent of brain health, and the health and wellness of our geriatric community. I thank him for m childhood, for naughty toons, then funny aliens, odd scottish women, and more toons, presidents, teachers, psychiatrists, dead presidents. People who ate my food and paid me a compliment. I'm not making sense, just writing random things now Thank you sir How's your seat up there? I don't care how you went, the laughter you caused is worth 1mil seats in heaven I reread this pizzle I posted. sweat from a babboons balls I think mr hall would say. I learned that you could be different, funny, hide, and be yourelf all in one go. That people will never knew the real you. I really wish he had a better support system, shown how much people really loved him... i hate that I couldn't have been one of those people. My food was good but I think my influence would have been better.

http://believemefilm.com?hlr=f6f_vmmE If anyone who reads this could click the link, I make a bit of money off of promoting this movie. I think it has alright potential, plus I love Christopher MCD. Cheers

Pac Man Adventures today